The beauty tools I starting using when I stopped getting Botox

And others I've used and loved for years.

I remember the very first time I got Botox. I was 28. Yes, you read that right. 28. It was a few months before my wedding and at the time, I was working as a beauty editor. Preventative anti-aging was the big trend of the time, and neurotoxins like Botox (which is actually a brand containing botulinum toxin type A not the treatment itself) were just beginning to enter the mainstream beauty conversation.

If you follow editors or influencers on social media, you’ll know one the biggest perks is freebies. Well, I shouldn’t call them that. They are, for the most part, exchanges. There’s almost always either an agreement in place or at the very least, an expectation that you’ll share the product or your experience with your audience.

For me back in 2013, this meant trialling treatments and products in exchange for an article or mention on the women’s lifestyle website I was writing for at the time.

I’ll never forget laying down on the treatment bed and the injector — a doctor — gave me a plastic glove that had been filled with water and frozen to place on my face and numb the area between my eyes, around my eyes and my forehead. There was no consultation about how many units she recommended for me being so close to my wedding, or even what type of neurotoxin she would be using. I simply numbed my face with the frozen hand and off she went, injecting tiny needles into my face.

I hold a lot of grace for the version of me that was experiencing that particular professional season. The one who was surfing the magical beauty editor wave, extracting every ounce of value she could. I knew it was such a rare opportunity and it was even more rare for someone with no beauty background or training to be in a role like that in the first place.

As you can probably guess, I couldn’t move my face very much on my wedding day. I was frozen. Like most brides, I cried walking down the aisle but you wouldn’t know it as I couldn’t express any emotion. I find looking at the photos tricky for this reason, and also because I now realise how dissociated I was on the day. In the micro moments I did manage to return to my body, I was carrying my mum’s crippling anxiety on her behalf. Anyone with a parent, partner or friend who has an extreme panic or anxiety disorder will know that we often take on their state as our own when they are in our presence (or should I say care?) and we work hard to ensure the environment is optimal or at least less triggering for them. Turns out this conditioned behaviour does not magically go away on one of the biggest days of your life.

Back to the Botox. The tools are coming soon, too.

What’s interesting — or maybe not at all — is that despite not liking the effect Botox had on my face, I went on to do it once, twice, sometimes three times a year for the next decade. I changed providers three times in those 10 years and for the most part, maintained low units. The longest period I went without Botox was around 20 months when I was pregnant with and then breastfeeding my daughter, but I was one of those lucky women who had glowy, plump skin during pregnancy and the post-partum period so I didn’t really miss my baby B.

I actually think it’s only now that my face has full movement again that I can identify what I liked about Botox – and that was its ability to make me look “done” even when I had no makeup on or hadn’t slept well. The tightness, the shine, looking exactly the same year in, year out… it really was addictive.

This “done-ness” is what I am evolving beyond in my return to naturalness. It’s a look I perfected as a beauty editor and fiercely maintained well beyond that role. Perfect nails. Perfect toe nails. Perfect eyebrows. Perfectly foiled hair. Plumped lips. A blunt bob. A mostly hairless body…

For me — and this is different for everyone — it was all starting to feel a bit rigid and restrictive. I was craving the me that exists outside the lines. Who is she? What does she look like? All of this maintaining was also starting to get very expensive and took up valuable time I could have been spending with my daughter.

Just like I can remember when I started getting Botox, I can also remember the moment I decided I’d stop. It was during a live session in my mentorship space and a co-creator was sharing something really personal and painful. I realised that because she couldn’t see the emotion and empathy I was feeling in my body reflected on my face, she didn’t feel held in that moment.

I simply can't have that. I won't have that.

It’s still early days but I find it hard to describe how… myself I am feeling. I feel so… authentic. Which is so cliche to say but that’s really what I feel like. I feel authentically me. I feel at home in my body and my appearance which is something I didn’t expect. I started this journey home to a more natural external state assuming there’d be a lot of self-loathing and comparison but that has not surfaced at all. I actually feel more confident than I did when I was getting *all of the things* and this has been a huge surprise for me. It makes me sigh with relief.

I don’t hate my natural face. I don’t feel ugly or old. I just feel like me.

This is probably a good time to reiterate that I don’t think injectables, gel nails or any other beauty treatment is wrong and I don’t judge anyone who chooses these acts of devotion and self care for themselves. Whatever makes us feel happy, beautiful and seated in our personal power is what we should be doing and enjoying. What I’m exploring here is honouring the moment something doesn’t feel true anymore and allowing ourselves to choose differently. To choose again instead of maintaining the same.

I’ve been thinking about it and I can definitely see how turning to beauty tools and techniques instead of getting Botox is another way I am potentially resisting the ageing process. Like, do I really “love the ritual of daily gua sha” or is what’s sitting at the heart of scraping my face with a piece of metal a faint sense of hope that being consistent with it will keep me looking 28?

And this is the other thing — I actually feel like I am a good case study for Botox as a preventative treatment. I keep finding myself waiting for the scaffolding to fall down or for all these wrinkles and frown lines to pop up overnight, but the more I think about it the more I realise my face hasn’t moved in 10 years, I didn’t have any wrinkles to start with and I’ve been using SPF every day since 2012. So maybe I’m just getting started with my cutie creases.

Alright, the tools! Get to the damn tools. Here’s everything I’ve got in rotation right now in my slow and steady return to naturalness. Almost all of these tools exist to support the body in performing its natural functions. Some of these are new, some I’ve been using for years.

1. Nightly gua sha

No one talks about how slippery it gets when you’re all oiled up and sweeping a stone across your face. I’ve dropped and smashed three stone gua shas so I’m now using a stainless steel one which I love for its durability and its antimicrobial properties (I did get a few breakouts when I was using the stone ones even though I cleaned after each use). I bought this one from Amazon which isn’t at all values aligned for me but I couldn’t bring myself to pay another $60 for one that — in most cases — comes from a similar supplier but with an extreme markup. I watched a few expert tutorials and then developed my own routine based on the areas I want to focus on. It’s probably not “right” but it works for me.

2. Daily facial reflexology

This one has surprised me the most! I didn’t realise how much tension I was holding in my face even though I practice soft living and soft business. While it does release tension, the main purpose of reflexology is stimulating acupressure points to clear energy — qi — blockages in the body. I bought this acupressure pen from Self Bloom Co. (owned by Kymberly, a talented founder in my seasonal mentorship space) and I keep it at my desk. Once or twice a day I’ll whip it out and press, roll or sweep. I follow a face reflexology chart I found online.

3. Lymphatic drainage cup

I sit a lot in general but after I had my daughter I was feeling quite sluggish in my body. Rather than opting for a detox or cleanse, I decided to try dry body brushing before showering and then lymphatic drainage while in the shower. Magic combo but not for the faint hearted! Well, in the beginning at least. I am prone to bruising and when I first started using a lymphatic drainage cup in the shower each day it was painful. My thighs were black and blue for a few weeks but now there’s no pain at all, never any bruising and very little water retention. Also feel it’s worth noting that while cellulite is normal, natural and beautiful, mine did mostly disappear through using this tool. Consistency is key. I bought this body sculpt kit from Biotyspa after having a lymphatic drainage massage when my daughter was about six months old and still use the same cup today but mixed with any shower gel or body oil. I use this dry body brush. I’ve tried many over the years but this, IMO, is the best one. I'm onto my third.

4. Tongue scraper

For me, there’s life before tongue scraping and life after tongue scraping. I started scraping my tongue every morning upon rising when I learnt Vedic meditation in late 2018. An Ayurvedic technique and belief, tongue scraping is said to remove the toxins and bacteria that surface on the tongue overnight while we sleep, helping to detoxify the system. It’s best to use a pure copper tongue scraper like this one from Jes Chev (another talented founder in my mentorship space) but right now I’m using a stainless steel one. I have no idea why I bought a stainless steel one to be honest with you. I think I was buying vitamins online and chucked it into my cart without realising it wasn’t copper.

5. Metal razor

I switched to this Aesop razor about five years ago and I haven’t looked back. While not anti-aging related, it is skin related so I wanted to include it in this beauty tools round-up. It comes with disposable stainless steel blades you insert between the chrome plates and they last so long. It’s quite heavy (in a good way) and I dropped my first one in the shower, cracking the ceramic base. I’d only had it for a couple of months and I was so annoyed. My mum tried gluing it back together and that worked for a while, but then I went ahead and treated myself to another one. Now I grip onto it for dear life when I’m shaving my legs in the shower. Besides the benefit of not having to buy plastic razors all the time, I find my hair grows back slower and finer — both on my legs and under my arms.

6. Scalp oiling

I didn’t want to believe the scalp oiling hype but goodness me the TikTok hair girlies have those before and afters locked down. I just had to try it. I’ve stopped colouring my hair while I transition from bright blonde to my natural colour of dark blonde and I also want to grow it quite long so hair health is a priority for me right now. I believed I had the slowest growing hair of all time but it turns out it was all the colouring and bleaching as I’ve had incredible growth spurts of late — especially when I’m consistent with washing no more than three times a week, air drying as much as possible and scalp oiling a couple of times a week. I bought this root comb applicator and use this JVN pre-wash scalp oil I was gifted a while back. I recently bought pure rosemary oil without realising you have to mix it back with a carrier oil. Honestly wish I’d just bought this Hinu hair growth oil instead.

7. Scalp massage

When I have the oil applied, I use a scalp massager like this one. Mine is black and I was gifted it a while back. I had no idea what it was until I saw someone on TikTok using it and thought wait, I have one of those! I read that it’s best to use when your hair is dry and you have the oil applied vs. as a shampoo brush when you’re in the shower. I’ve tried both and much prefer to massage my scalp when my hair is dry.

8. Glass nail file & cuticle oil

Lastly, my biggest beauty break-up of all: Gel manicures. I’ve either painted my nails or gotten my nails done for as long as I can remember. My mum worked as a nail technician when I was growing up and taught me to paint my nails perfectly so it became a bit of a comfort thing. There was also some control stuff wrapped up in there as well, I think. I started going to Polished Atelier on recommendation from my hairdresser and that’s when my nail obsession went to a whole new level. What started as a quick, $45 gel manicure at any nail salon in Bondi every few weeks turned into a monthly nail ritual that took nearly three hours door-to-door and cost $150. Polished follows a Russian manicure technique which helped me to grow my nails super long and achieve my dream Betty Draper nails. I loved them but there was a point where it just felt too much. Too done. Too kept. Too… perfect? I removed the gel and attempted to keep my length but in the end, had to cut them down and start from scratch. I bought this glass nail file and this cuticle oil (which I use everyday) and I’m so pleased with how my nails are looking. So strong and healthy! I do paint them with this 10-free nail polish from time to time.

Hope you found this one interesting. What beauty tools do you love using? Comments are open.

Alison xo